Edna Mary Moody

Edna Mary Moody was born on 3^rd March, 1917, a war child, with bombs still falling on London. Her father was Alfred, a postman, who served during the war as a corporal in the ASC (Army Service Corps). I recall Mum telling us that in those days letters were even delivered on Christmas day and so no presents could be opened until his return at 6.00 pm. Her mother was Louisa (nde Budd), who      as fondly known to us all as "Lou Lou". They lived firstly at 12, Needham Terrace, but later moved into 72 Coles Green Road, in Cricklewood. Alfred died on 14^th March 1948 and Lou Lou re-married in 1950 to become Butcher, living at Waltham Cross. She later came to live with us in Earlsfeld and with her other daughter Ruby in Cricklewood. She died 17^th March 1969. Whist Mum did this with much love she always said that she never wanted to be a burden on us and planned her last years in sheltered accommodation at Danefield and then Abbeyfield and arranged and set out her own funeral service.

Edna completed her schooling and I believe worked in a florists for a while until she became a nurse. She married to my father Frederick Ruddock on 21^st  August 1948, aged 31 (he was age 34). On 14^th February 1954 I arrived. We lived in a second floor flat at 67, Clarendon Drive, Putney. He was a meter collector for the London Electricity Board and served as a sergeant in the Second World War, in Egypt. Sadly Fred died age 44 on 18^th January 1958 of cancer of the stomach, when I was aged just 4 years old. I have little memory of him, but do remember "stealing" his tea when he came in from work, sipping it from a saucer poured for me. Mum had to go back to work and went to J Lyons. I hated nursery and had to go to a child-minder afterwards until she got back from work. I do, however, have fond memories of being with her at this time: seeing the red squirrels on Putney Common, of trains espied though a rivet hole in the bridge, of a pedal car, of feeding the gulls and swans by the river, the little black and white TV second hand from repair man down the road), searching for the blue twist salt in the packet of crisps bought as a treat and of visits from Auntie Ethel especially being dangled upside down on her lap to "fishes_, in the sea".

I am told that a little match-making went on at Lyons and that Reg was persuaded to ask Edna out. He had sadly lost his wife. Well they were married on 14^th March 1960 at the Registry, Tooting Graveney and this was solemnized afterwards at All Saints, Wandsworth. Hilda gained a brother and I a sister. One year later Jon arrived, born on 22^nd January 1961. We were living then at 167 Burntwood Lane, Earlsfield. I remember that Hilda and I had measles at the time. I have more fond memories as we all grew up together. I remember being admonished for dropping Jon on his head as a baby- well it doesn't appear to have had any long term effect! I recall trips out on the motorbike and sidecar, Mum riding pillion, until the sidecar floor gave way and it became impractical with three children. Dad sold it and got a Lambretta to get to work on. There were day trips to Wimbledon Common, Hampton Court and the zoo at Chessington, travelling on the train. Later they invested in a car - a Morris 1100. Holidays were taken usually on the South coast: in a caravan at Bracklesham Bay and also Lyme Regis, and B&B at Swanage or on the Isle of Wight. One year we ventured to Ilfracombe by train. These were happy days playing on the beach and paddling in the sea.

They liked to entertain when they could and to be with relations; there were visits to and from the Hewisons and the Ruddock sisters. Ethel was a special favourite and came with us a few times on holiday. I have recollections of Mum taking me to go and stay with Ethel, Beatrice Ruby, Will and Ann and with Elsie, Albert and Anna and co.

They were always kind and generous to us as parents. They would always encourage, but never push too hard. I recall that Mum would get the housekeeping money on Thursday and that she would have tuppence left in her purse the following Wednesday: yet we were always well fed and clothed. If you were hungry then it was bread and dripping and if you were lucky there was some of the jelly bit left. I do recall life as being somewhat bleak in winter, with lino floors in the earlier years and the freezing bedrooms and bathroom. Dad liked his food plain and Mum served up a menu to a weekly timetable - starting with Sunday roast, with beef if there was a little more money around, cold meat and chips, mince, stew followed by rice pudding, fish and chips from the chippy and liver and bacon. 1 don't think Reg was too impressed when Mum went to cookery lessons at the Adult Education Centre across the road as it was a bit too rich for his taste. She also learnt cake decoration and flower-arranging and was talented at both.

We all grew up and went to the local primary and junior schools. Later I scraped into Emmanuel Grammar at Battersea and Jon followed. Hilda went to Lady Margaret's in Fulham. I remember being told to get on with my homework - I just needed to get it done!

Church and Sunday School were compulsory until our teens, but after this it was up to us. I returned to the Church and was confirmed age 40, much to Mum's joy as she was a strong Christian all her life.

We were allowed alcohol on special occasions at an early age, with watered wine and shandy with much lemonade. Gambling was not allowed, although a shilling on the Boat Race was expected. Living outside your means was a "no, no" and I remember being so astonished that when I was saving for my first proper camera at age 14 that when they learnt of this they leant me the money so that I could have it in time for the holiday.

I went to work at 18 and stayed at the family home rather late into my twenties. Hilda went off to Salford to University and I think Jon had to move out as Reg retired and they went to live on the South Coast in about 1983.

They bought the bungalow at Nyetimber, on the edge of Bognor. Here Mum took up painting and joined the local art club, becoming quite skilled, with no real tutelage. They had good times visiting local places well known to them along the coast and holidaying in Scotland. The arrival of three grandchildren was a source of great joy for Mum. Sadly Reg died in March 1991 and the bungalow became too much for her. She had never had to pay a bill in her life and the worry of maintenance and of being alone, if anything should happen, became too much. She chose and moved to the sheltered flats at Sylvan way in about 1993 and entered into the church family at St Wilfrid's. Then planning for the future after an illness she found and moved into Abbeyfield in the late 90's, firstly into the "look after yourself" part and then in failing health into the full-care part.

She has always shared our joys in life, but never admonished or judged us when it has not been so good.

A highlight in her life was the visit to Holy Land with the Rev Roger Calder and a small band of pilgrims from St Wilfrid’s, Bognor, whom I was privileged to join. This meant so much to her spiritually.

Roger Davies, whilst at St Wilfrid's became good friends with her and like a son, I am not sure who adopted who! She spent a lot of time with Roger Calder’s  daughter who became like a granddaughter to her.

She loved it when we took the grandchildren to see her over the summer and we camped nearby at West Wittering or Barnham, where she was able to join us for trips out and barbecues at the camp. A favourite place was the Bird Centre at Pagham, where she adopted Holly, the Barn Owl.

She much enjoyed her walks along the promenade and when she couldn't walk as much we bought her the buggy. She fell off once and fortunately did not injure herself. We found this quite funny that she had "fallen of her trolley", but I am not sure she really saw the joke. She hurt her ankle and couldn't see the irony in her claim that she was able to get about on the buggy with this, yet this was the very cause of her injury! l used to pray a lot when she was on the buggy, but somehow she seemed to survive. She would insist it had to be on speed 6 all the time and had little road sense, never having learnt to drive a car. Eventually venturing outdoors became too much and In the last year or two she has had no mobility, but remained cheerful. A good barometer has been her usually healthy appetite. She has always, been cheerful - her pet phrase at one time was "little mumbles – no grumbles”.  Her constant companion over her last years has been a little dog, with no name, which I have seen her cuddle like a baby. I think I know who should have this, Rachae! She has always been a quite determined lady.

God has looked down upon us as I was with her on Monday 1^st August en-route to France for a holiday. Although she was very sleepy I held her hand and we looked into each other’s eyes and I was able to say thank you to her and say goodbye. I said the Lord's prayer and hummed Kumbya to her. I think she knew that this was her release as I got the call in France on Tuesday to say that Alexis at the home had been with her as she passed away peacefully in the morning.

God has stayed with me. On Sunday last at our Church service in Ribchester the organist played Kumbya in the introduction music for the communion and the last hymn we sang, chosen by Gill our Rector two weeks before, was "Now thank we all our God" which in the first verse reads:

"Who from our mother's arms hath blessed us on our way"

and later:

"And free us from all ills in this world and the next"

Reg was a quiet and gentle man and her soul-mate. I know little of her relationship with my father Fred, but I think Reg was "the one." Certainly she always talked about him with great fondness. I don't quite know how all this works out up in heaven when  you have been married twice, but it can only be good news. I would like to finish with her parting words to Reg:

"Goodbye my darling Reg, `till we meet again. I shall miss you so. All my love"

And so goodbye dear Edna, You have been a very special mother, grandmother, relation and friend to so many whose hearts you have touched, and such a talented person, giving joy to us all. We will miss you, but you are where you want to be with your beloved Reg and with God, so until we meet again, goodbye.

Peter Ruddock